If only..

Making the best of right now.

Keeping away from negative energy and thinking of the future are just part of the thought flow in my head. 

Tomorrow is never promised. 

If today's your last day would you be happy with what you did? You get home from whatever and wherever, lay down in bed. The light switches on in your mind that your never going to open your eyes again.

Why did you stay in that shitty job never getting your life in line so you could make some progress. Quit spending money you don't have just to rutt yourself firmly into your current place?

Why did you get so upset at that guy driving like an ass? And that person asking you so many questions on the phone.

Was it worth all the things you did?

You traded your last day of life for what you did today.

Everyone is different but I'd like to be able to say I tried my best, I tried to make peoples day as good as possible, I did not waste time being upset and negative.

Today was Ian's birthday. I went out this morning before work and put some flowers my mom and I picked on his grave marker were his head stone will be placed. It was a perfectly rainy, foggy, cold overcast day. Just like he'd like.

I picked up a friend who needed a ride to work. I drove a bit out of my way to try a new cafe to eat at. It looked pretty family owned, Ian always took joy in having a meal not only with friends but in eating food made with love. I think I'd have to agree that if it isn't healthier for your heart that it is for your soul.

Some girls came in towards late afternoon and I agreed to get them tattooed that evening. I gave them a good deal, tried to make it a good time and did my best on their tattoos. They were estatic and tipped me in little Debbie brownies.

I came home to a warm home made dinner and fresh cinnamon rolls on the counter.

I'd like to think I spent his day in a way he'd be happy to have shared.